The Albatross

by Devin Sinha

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Devin Sinha
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Devin Sinha This was the first album I ever published, made at home with mostly my voice and acoustic guitar. I hope you find something to relate to in this intimate, raw album. Favorite track: When We Sleep.
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about

Devin Sinha's debut album, The Albatross, communicates themes of Love and Loss through clear acoustic guitar, honest lyrics, and heartfelt vocals. The intentionally sparse instrumentation gives the album a personal quality, as though the album was meant to be played on the edge of a bed for the singer and listener to experience alone, but together.

credits

released December 14, 2013

Written, Produced, and Performed by Devin Sinha
Album Artwork by Ariel Sinha
Featuring Austin Quick on keyboard on tracks 2, 3, 5, 7, 8, and 15
Mixed by Devin Sinha
Mastered by Devin Sinha and Caleb Roman

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about

Devin Sinha Seattle, Washington

Devin is a singer/songwriter living in Seattle, hailing from Midwestern roots as he spent most of his life around Kansas City. His style is primarily acoustic indie/folk, mixing autobiographical flavors into his fiction of poetry and music. Songs tend toward narrative verse, with lyrics and feeling taking front row center, often complemented by guitar, keyboard, and bass. ... more

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Track Name: Poem I: The Train
The Train

I am an empty train blowing its whistle as it comes through town,
       You are the silent night that drinks in the noise and says nothing.
I sound the call for the words that fall inarticulately from my chapped mouth,
sore from pressing my lips together saying please, one more round.
One more round and one more shot for me because we drained the bottle on we
while you were thinking "What's best for 'me'" and I was thinking "When did you and me become we and then you once more?"

I am the wheels pushing against the iron rails with immutable inertia.
Because the track only goes one way and if I stay, there's no getting started again.
But the killing joke is that I'm on the slope and going down anyway.
No, not in flame and not in blame but into a valley I haven't seen for a long time,
filled with doubt, ambivalence, malaise
and longing for the days when this was not the answer.
So I feel lost -- and filled with worry -- that perhaps
I am the end of my own journey.

We are the distance between two points that nullifies when we're together,
My dreams and ambitions drew that line between us with a suitcase and a plane ticket --
a tear and a kiss -- and words like "I miss you"  when what I meant to say was
"Please don't forget me tomorrow."

I am the half remembered song that would play every morning,
       You are the harmony that made the melody beautiful.
Where are the dreams we were promised?
Track Name: A Song In The Dark
A Song In The Dark

I woke up this morning,
went out in the rain
past the man selling papers
to the old eastbound train.
All that I saw
when I came home
was another day gone
and a man all alone

in the mirror, when I look up
for the light in my eyes
that each day's growin' dimmer,
and I'm not surprised.

I heard you'd been roamin'
all over the states,
never settling down
or stayin' in one place.
I thought about calling, or
maybe that I'd write,
but the friend I remembered
who once was a light

in the part of my heart,
where I needed it most,
is just a song in the dark
and her face is a ghost in my mind.

I laid down beside you
some eighteen months past.
"Will you feel as I'm feeling?"
was the question unasked.
You couldn't see me
for the stars in our eyes.
As we folded together
I could feel your heart rising

and fall, as I matched it
keeping pace every beat.
Never felt so much sadness,
never tasted so sweet.
Track Name: November Passing
She said it was a tough year
There wasn't more to say
We stayed and watched the sunset
before we left his grave

Love me like a brother
or treat me like a friend
Take me for your lover
but know me in the end

They loved him for his failure
They paid him for his time
You said he left a stranger
He was a friend of mine

Take me to the water
Wash me in the sea
As autumn finds the winter
remain a friend to me

She said it was a tough year
There wasn't more to say
We turned and left each other
the flowers on his grave
Track Name: Song For Past Loves
You told me on the phone it wasn't just Paris
You told me to my face I'm not the one you cherish anymore
You told me it's too late, we shouldn't get started
You told me once I shut folks out I always get so hard hearted

You called my bluff
I was always so tough on you
I held you above the crowd
I held my hopes on you

You told me I was always good 'bout showin' how I loved you
You told me wishin' hard don't always make it true
You told me you wanted to be important in my life
You told me someone else would make a better wife

You called my bluff
I was always so tough on you
I held you above the crowd
I held my hopes on you

We bring back, bring back what we find to see us through
Bring me back, bring me back to you

You told me now you couldn't be with me
You told me someday that you might want to be
You told me once I felt like family
You told me now that I would never be

You called my bluff
I was always so tough on you
I held you above the crowd
I held my hopes on you
Track Name: When We Sleep
I'd never considered myself to be lonely
'til you came along my way, saw what I had been missing
Now that I know you, I can only feel sorry
for all the years wasted without you here by me

You dance in the daytime to all your favorite songs
At the foot of our bed, tell me stories so long
Going out in the evening, counting stars in the sky
Your eyes in the moonlight make me feel so sublime

And when we sleep it's not alone
We're not alone any longer dear
And when I wake with you beside me I feel whole
I feel home

When clouds blanket the heavens, can't see in front of our faces
Making love in the dark, our souls, our oasis
In the late summer grass, lie close in the pitch black
Rest your head on my shoulder with my hand on your back

And when we sleep it's not alone
We're not alone any longer dear
And when I wake with you beside me I feel whole
I feel home

I drink up our moments, keep them locked in my mind
When the days hit me hardest and I'm falling behind
When the world seems its worst, and I'm feeling confined
And reasons to have faith become so hard to find

You bring me back to earth
Hold my hand to remind
Love makes life worth living
With our fingers entwined

And when we sleep it's not alone
We're not alone any longer dear
And when I wake with you beside me I feel whole
I feel home
Track Name: When I Was A Young Man
When I was a young man I had me a friend
When I was a young man, you know I still am
Her kisses were wildfire, I lived in her hands
When I was a young man I had me a friend

She liked to cut class and she cut me with words
She made me so high then kicked me in the dirt
You better believe it, that girl she could hurt
But by the way we made up, you know it was worth it

When I was a young man I had me a friend
When I was a young man you know I still am
She dressed just like midnight, she undressed like sand
When I was a young man I had me a friend

The girl liked to win, but she never would gloat
She sang in the choir and hit every note
When she told me she loved me, the words caught in her throat
but it's not what you say, girl, it's all how you show it

When I was a young man I had me a friend
When I was a young man you know I still am
Her couch it was vintage, her clothes second-hand
When I was a young man I had me a friend

Her wine in the closet, she kept a gun in the drawer
Each of them knew what the other was for
When the cork popped, the gun shot, we were down on the floor
That girl could blow kisses, ah, but sometimes she did more

When I was a young man I had me a friend
When I was a young man you know I still am
Now she's east of the Rockies, I'm west of Spokane
When I was a young man I had me a friend

She felt lost in the cities but loved it outside
Liked to sleep when the sun's up, loved driving at night
When she drove off you know it hurt more than my pride
But eventually even the worst pain subsides

When I was a young man I had me a friend
When I was a young man you know I still am
Some days I still love her, I think she understands
When I was a young man I had me a friend

When I was a young man I had me a friend
When I was a young man you know I still am
The best things in life sometimes we never plan
When I was a young man I had me a friend
Track Name: Outro
In the future you will find me in some forest in the north.
Like the thirteen year cicada, I will emerge from the earth.
We will smile and talk politely as we see who we've become
and I'll return to sleep alone, but I won't be the only one.

Should we never be together? Would it were easy to say.
Will I lie inside the earth alone at the end of all my days?
For today, I think it's better that you turn and you are gone
and allow me to remember, as I keep you close in song
Track Name: When I Was Your All
Falling fast from fear
Falling for the forest
The drums sound near
My heart beating the chorus
Gather here
Closer draws the hour
Let your mind grow clear
Beside the virgin's bower

And eyes, close your eyes and recall
When I was your all

Soothe your soul
Snare the seething demons
And I'll extol
Your life and want for no one
Control your doubt
Prune the empty blackness
And you will rout
The pain that came to transgress

Lie and rest, in the feather down
To wake with my kiss upon your garland crown

And I know time trickles to a flood as we grow old
And I know I'll stand alone when day is done and I am bone
And I know the dreams you dreamt at night were not the same as mine
Though I'll go, I hope you wake to find some inner peace of mind

Wake my love
The dawn is calling gently
Take hold of
My hand, follow intently
Find the stream
The stones it washes over
Sit with me
Beside the grass and clover
Truly see
My life laid bare before you
With all esprit
My love your soul to imbue

And eyes, close your eyes and recall
When I was your all
Track Name: Poem II: The Shouldered Cornet
The Shouldered Cornet

The shouldered cornet breathes the sun
Of wars long past, of those to come
It glints and shines, reflecting light
Onto the spoilt fields

The shouldered cornet breathes new life
Into the depths of timeless fights
The men take up their needed arms
And raise their trusted shields

The shouldered cornet kissed the lips
And felt the strength in fingertips
Of oh so many gallant friends
Whom it may kiss no more

“Strike up! Strike out!”  the cornet cries,
To sounds of battle in reply
Yet over the cacophony
Its powerful voice soars

The shouldered cornet passes on
From fallen friend with outstretched arms
And each new master knows its worth
Drawing it up in kind

The shouldered cornet knows no songs
Save those of loss, of husbands gone
Of brothers, sons who gave their souls
But linger in the mind

The shouldered cornet rests each night
And sleeps to call out to the sight
Of dawn upon the pitch below
But for now is at rest

So when you hear the cornet call
Take up your arms! And above all
Fight with honor, for in the its cry
You and I
Oh, You and I
You and I are so blessed
Track Name: The Albatross > Flying
The Albatross

I was born at sea, I call no land my home
No king and no country, the sea spray soaks into my bones
I have no love of quays, I was born to tame the waves
I was born at sea, and I will live here all my days

I have no port of call, I was made for open air
I fear no man nor beast, I fear no pirate nor corsair
My men, they sound the drums, my men they keep time with the oars
The ocean calls to me, and there is so much to explore

'Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin
'Til you came down, to curse me from within
'Til I came across my albatross

We were two months at sea, hundreds of leagues beyond the strands
The lookout called to me, the spyglass shaking, shaking in his hands
Your raft adrift and you, a small and comely, lonely thing
I mounted the rescue, brought you aboard, wet, shivering

I looked into your eyes, your gaze was pure, your blue eyes held
A quiet hushed the deck, a stirring I had never felt
I wrapped you in my coat, gave you my quarters for to rest
To have survived, crew said, you must be good and truly blessed

'Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin
'Til you came down, to curse me from within
'Til I came across my albatross

The wind, it left our sails, it would seem we were becalmed
I heard the singing whales, lending a voice to my alarm
When you arose that night, you found me standing at the bow
The focsle quiet, still, you took my arm and touched my brow

I had a sailor's heart, no woman e'er meant much to me
My love for balingers, carracks, picards, longships, and galleys
Your touch was something new, light as snowfall in the air
I felt such love for you, I knew of nothing to compare

'Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin
'Til you came down, to curse me from within
'Til I came across my albatross

The days marched on no change, since you arrived no wind in air
No fish, no birds, no life, just water, water everywhere
It began with a hush, a murmur lingered under deck
That you had brought this pain, and you would leave us all a wreck

The panic grew and swelled until it reached a fever pitch
They asked, "What awful hell sent you our captain to bewitch?"
I called for calm, reason, I swore you meant none of them ill
They shouted mutiny, they called for both our blood to spill

They tied us to the mast, the crossbow quarrels taught and cocked
They asked what words we'd say, we never spoke, our pale eyes locked
And as they loosed, you changed, the rope fell from you to the ground
And as you flew away, your beating wings the only sound

Til you came down, with feathers 'neath the skin
Til you came down, to curse me from within
Til I came across my albatross

I was born at sea, and I will live here all my days



Flying

I am flying, flying
Oh mother, look at me now
I am flying, flying
Oh mother, look at me now

Oh, I know I fell so hard (for you)
I know I fell so far (from you)

But now I'm flying, flying
Oh father, look at me now
I am flying, flying
Oh father, look at me now

Love isn't always what it seems
And I fell out of love when you weren't in my dreams

But now I'm flying, flying
Oh lover, look at me now
I am flying, flying
Oh lover, look at me now
Track Name: A True Love Song
Can we just get serious for a moment?
Can we talk about the elephant in the room?
I know that you're not one for confrontation
but the train's leaving the station
and I too am leaving soon.

You're the one who keeps her feelings locked up
while I spill mine out, glass marbles in the sun
and when you share they're from your measuring cup
while I pluck mine for a close-up
and examine every one.

Look into my eyes.
This is the
time where you and I
decide we're gonna last,
decide the past is past
and we're still in it.

Can you tell me again what you were thinkin'
when you said this ship is sinkin' and you smashed the boiler room?
You know that that's no way to solve our problems,
but if you try to let the light in
I can work it out with you.

I know well that we are so magnetic,
push and pull so energetically depending on the day.
I love you, I'm unapologetic
and there is no anesthetic
for the hurt when you're away.

Look into my eyes.
This is the
time where you and I
decide we're gonna last,
decide the past is past
and we're still in it.

Let's forget about who didn't do what and when.
Let's drop the tally of which wrong was done to whom.
That was then, years are past, and we're much older;
summer's gone and winter's colder
but my love for you still blooms.

Do you remember the first date we shared together:
The sunset on the water and the songs I played for you?
You watched my hands, I watched the smile in your eyes and
now the songs that I devise
I sing to show my love for you.

Look into my eyes.
This is the
time where you and I
decide we're gonna last,
decide the past is past
and we're still in it.
Track Name: Across The World
What would you call a man lying in bed
with your name in his head
and the words to a book he never read out to you?

What would you do, if all that you knew
was you planted your heart but nothing ever grew,
if nothing took root?

And where would you go, if all left to show
after four years of dinners and movies and shows
and drives through the snow
and drives through the woods
and everything good in the touch of his hand
was the face of a man --
just the face of a man
and a feeling you once but no more understand
what excited you so?

How would you sleep in a foreign city
if the stars in your sky when you look up at night
weren't the ones from your birth,
and the last place on earth that you thought you would miss
was the same place you'd inked on the skin of your wrist?
And who do you kiss?
Do her lips taste like wine or do they taste like his?
Do the boys wish to know you by heart or by bed?
Do you ever instead
think of a life you gave up for a life,
think of the man who wished you for his wife?
Track Name: How Old
male:
how old, how old, will I live, then die alone
how old, how old, when they finally carve my stone
I'll be holding you tonight but my soul's out on the road
how old, how old, will I live, then die alone

female:
how long, how long, will you keep singing this song
how long, how long, 'til you see that I'm the one
I've been working in the field, and you're my burning sun
so how long, how long, will you keep singing this song

chorus:
Take me down, I was selfish when you were around
string me up by my feet, oh oh oh oh oh
Talk me down, I'm standing too high above ground
You're the only friend I see

male:
I've never known someone that I could call my own
I'm just someone that everyone I've known's outgrown
the thread has all come apart from every quilt I've sewn
I've never known someone that I could call my own

female:
but don't you see, the love I give to you is free
there are no strings, no wires no one's pulling me
I'll give you all I have, you're all I live and breathe
you gotta love yourself, before you can love me

chorus
Track Name: Love Anytime
Sometimes I dream if we'd still be the same
If we lived and we loved in some long ago age
Well I knew when I met you I'd love you always
And I know I'll be with you for all of my days

What if we lived in fifteenth century
Outside of Versailles or in Rome, Italy
Where we'd listen to poets and meet DaVinci
But I don't speak the language, it's not meant to be

Maybe in England we could be amazed
When young Oscar Wilde was still writing plays
But the streets and air were so caked in pollution
I'm not sure I'd love to live through revolution

Sometimes I dream if we'd still be the same
If we lived and we loved in some long ago age
Well I knew when I met you I'd love you always
And I know I'll be with you for all of my days

New Year's, 1920 out on the east coast
I'd wear tailored suits and I'd buy you fur coats
But you had little voice and you hadn't won the vote
So maybe the '20s aren't when I'd love most

The '30s if Wall Street pulled me to the ground
And we stood in the soup line that stretched through the town
Well I'd love you the same, but it's too much to ask
For your love to drink wine from the dry grapes of wrath, no, no

The '60s were wild, could be we'd begin
With love in the air but a war we couldn't win
And when men are condemned by the shade of their skin
I'd much rather, much rather be loving the person within

Sometimes I dream if we'd still be the same
If we lived and we loved in some long ago age
Well I knew when I met you I'd love you always
And I know I'll be with you for all of my days
Track Name: The Ones We Are
I remember you were smiling
As we travelled up the coast
When the train pulled in I kissed your hand
Met your eyes and pulled you close

You were flying down a mountain
The wind was whipping at your clothes
The one I took adventures with
Was the girl I loved the most

But if you spend too much time
Thinking about where it all went wrong
You might forget the ones we are
Are not the things that we have done
And you would laugh at the jokes that we'd tell, though you might be the only one
And that alone would have been enough for me

I captured you with words
I'm in the pictures you have drawn
Both allow us to relive the past
When the past itself is gone

They put you in the movies
They put your sister in songs
But I wrote this one for you
Maybe she'll help you sing along

You always meet a deadline
Grit is written on your face
The eleventh hour came and went
But you always won the race

But if you spend too much time
Thinking about where it all went wrong
You might forget the ones we are
Are not the things that we have done
And you came through at the ends of the nights when I was rising with the sun
And that alone would have been enough for me

There was the time it all came down
The sadness scarred across your face
When the refuge of your bed
Became a trusted hiding place

And when you're wrestling with your demons
There is a line you can't retrace
Between who you were and how you are
When you're so forcibly displaced

But if you spend too much time
Thinking about where it all went wrong
You might forget the ones we are
Are not the things that we have done
And you would cry for ones that you loved when there was nothing to be done
And that alone would have been enough for me

You told me casting off your anchors
Doesn't mean you're lost at sea
Shallow waters and calm skies
Won't make a sailor out of me

You put a lock upon your memories
And swallowed down the only key
You bought a ticket back to Kansas
Sat beneath the family tree

But if you spend too much time
Thinking about where it all went wrong
You might forget the ones we are
Are not the things that we have done
And you knew what I meant when I said I always wanted to be a Tenenbaum
And that alone would have been enough for me
Track Name: A Way To Be
I got the car packed and followed the sun
I drove out west where there's work to be done
The miles came rolling down
Like the water in your eyes when I was leaving town
You told me how you loved me but could not remember why
I said, "that's one hell of a way to tell a friend of yours goodbye"
I wished you well and held you close against my chest just one more time
Before you went back to being yours and I went back to being mine

I got the mountains and the evergreen trees
Might say I got what I wanted but it wasn't what I need
Still, there's more to me than you, yeah, and I'm starting to see
A way, a way, a way to be

I reached the place where I was headed after 27 hours
I felt anxious and alive like Roland staring at his tower
From amidst a rolling sea made up of perfect blood red flowers
As the memories of you came pouring over like a shower
Like the waver in your voice when you were too upset for words
The glimmer in your eyes when you told me things no one's heard
Your arm around my waist when you were walking at my side
and the way your mouth would taste when I knew you in the night

I don't want to spend my time kissing girls that I don't love
I don't want to spend my life thinking about the man I was
I just want to build toward something that means something with someone
A way, a way, a way to be

I got the mountains and the evergreen trees
Might say I got what I wanted but it wasn't what I need
Still, there's more to me than you, yeah, and I'm starting to see
A way, a way, a way to be
Track Name: Dreaming Of You
She was lying in bed as the day broke outside
The sunlight sliding up her leg like the rising tide
She's my blonde haired baby with those big blue Bambi eyes
Got what I need between her ears, what I want between her thighs
As she woke she gently spoke, "Boy, ain't this a surprise,
I was just dreaming of you."

Well, I ain't no money man, but I sure to like to boast
I got the best damn woman on the Western Coast
She's an equal and a partner though you know she's never wrong
She may not know how to play, but she always sings along
She knows where everything goes and I know right where I belong
And it's right here dreaming of you

I was driving down to Lincoln from Washington state
I was south of Omaha, headed down the interstate
Well, the road is getting long, and the night is getting late
I had all the windows down just so I could stay awake
Well, the miles keep on tickin', and you know that I can't wait
'Til I'm back home dreaming with you

I went and told my sister and I went and told my friends
That I found the girl I'm gonna love and cherish 'til the end
Well, my sister she's a skeptic, and my friends, yeah, they are too
But one look into my eyes and they knew that it was true
Life is more than just the back swing, boy, you've got to follow through
and I'm always dreaming of you

I travelled out to see your parents and I asked them for their time
Said, "I've got a little bit of something big that's been on my mind."
I told them that I love you, how I think that you're divine
I asked them for their blessing, they said, "Now, boy, that'd be just fine."
Your dad hugged me, your mom kissed me, then they sent back down the line
Where I'm always dreaming of you

So I'm out on open road and I'm heading back West
To the one who gives me reason for the beating in my chest
She's my best friend in the world, she's the ruling queen
She's the spark of a match, and I'm the gasoline
And I've got to say by now she knows exactly what I mean
When I say I'm always dreaming of you
Track Name: Touch
I drove with both hands on the wheel
Makes all the difference in the world to me
The birds flocking north, you were headed down south
Riding out on a warm spring breeze

So I drop you off at the airport
Watch until they lock the doors
Oh, I hope when you touch back down,
You find what you're looking for

I take the pictures off the dusty shelves
Stick them face down in the bottom drawer
Sure, the day might come when I pull them back out
Or a day when I won't care no more

So I drop myself into bed
My blood is ice cold and my thoughts off shore
Oh, I hope when I touch back down,
I won't love you anymore
Track Name: God And Broken Glass
You were standing in the alley
crying into your phone.
I was lying on the bed
staring at the white wall, I was feeling
pretty alone.

You're so very penitent.
Your eyes were red and puffy.
I was saying, "It's alright, it's alright dear,"
but I was feeling pretty empty.

Broken glass at your feet,
and God in the sky.
Can you tell me, does it still leave room
for you and I?

String the lights out on the deck.
Put the angel on the tree.
Find a reason to forgive.
Find a reason to forget about me.

I said a prayer for the hungry,
dropped a dollar in the basket for the weak.
Mail off a Hallmark card to you,
signed "Your Friend," instead of "Love," because that's all you need.

If God is in our lives,
broken glass at your feet,
can you tell me does it still leave room
for you and me?
Track Name: Poem III: Sleep
When you lie down to sleep
Do you ever wonder
If the person you're thinks about thinks of you
When you're alone and dream of whom you care about
Is she also alone, and dreaming of you

Do you sleep just to dream her
And wake just to see her
Does she make every day you are with her seem new
And when you sleep to dream do you ever hope
She's also alone, and thinking of you
Track Name: Soldiering On
There was rain on the porch swing
and rain on my boots
and the hood to my jacket was drawn
when I saw you come skipping
your way up the street,
you were smiling, I'm soldiering on.

You gave me a carving
you found on the road
and you gave me a jar full of sand
from a beach far off somewhere
that I'll never see.
I was here and I gave you my hand.

I was a braggart, you were a rogue:
the best two this town's ever seen.
I was a drinker, and you liked to smoke
but between us we kept our souls clean.

There was sun on the water
and sun on your skin,
the evening came on as I strummed.
Your hair caught the last light,
your eyes caught the stars,
you voice caught the tune while I hummed.

You gave me a kiss
and loaned me your heart
and took me down into your bed.
I left town the next day
crossing fingers for you,
you crossed me right off your list instead.

I was a braggart, you were a rogue:
the best two this town's ever seen.
I was a drinker, and you liked to smoke
but between us we kept our souls clean.

There was dirt in the phone line
and under my nails
when the fighting and sighing was through.
You had ice in your veins and
stones in your eyes.
I was out cold and dreaming of you.

You gave me some heartbreak,
I gave you some too
when the Spring came and you were withdrawn.
I was always so faithful,
'least when you were around,
you were crying, I'm soldiering on.

You played the liar, and I played the fool:
the best two this town's ever seen.
Once or twice we forgot we were on the same side,
but between us we kept our souls clean.

There was rain on the porch swing
and rain on my boots
and the hood to my jacket was drawn
when I saw you come skipping
your way up the street,
you were smiling, I'm soldiering on.